29

Not So Far Anymore

While Akanksha is preparing for shifting...

Somewhere else... someone else was also lost in thoughts.

And that someone is... Yogesh.

He stood alone in the balcony, one hand resting on the railing, his eyes fixed somewhere in the distance.

The city was still awake.

Cars were passing below, lights were glowing in distant buildings, people were moving around...

But Yogesh's mind was somewhere else entirely.

Yogesh's pov...

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow is the day.

The day she would finally shift into her new apartment.

The apartment one floor above us.

I let out a slow breath.

Ek floor upar...

She would be just one floor away now.

Closer than she had ever been.

And somehow, that thought made my heart feel strangely light...

But at the same time, there was a small knot of worry sitting somewhere inside me.

Ab main usse zyada milunga...

Maybe randomly in the lift.

Maybe in the hallway.

Maybe downstairs.

Maybe she'd knock on my door just because she needed something.

And maybe....

Maybe i would finally get to see her more often.

A small smile appeared on my lips at the thought.

But it disappeared almost as quickly.

Pata nahi mujhe khush hona chahiye... ya worried.

Because being closer to her sounded beautiful.

But i also knew what that closeness meant.

More chances to see the person i had hurt.

More chances to notice the little changes in her.

More chances to realize how much she still mattered to me.

And perhaps...

More chances for my guilt to catch up with me.

I leaned my head against the balcony wall and closed my eyes.

"Akanksha..."

Her name escaped my lips so quietly that even i almost didn't hear it.

For months, i had convinced myself that distance was better.

That if i stayed away, maybe she would heal.

Maybe she would move on.

Maybe i wouldn't keep disturbing the peace she had slowly found.

But now she was coming closer.

Not because of me.

Not entirely, at least.

She had chosen that apartment for her own reasons.

Yet somewhere in the back of my mind, a selfish little part of me couldn't help feeling relieved.

At least ab woh door nahi hogi.

I smiled faintly.

Then immediately frowned at myself.

"Kya kar raha hoon main..."

Khush kyun ho raha hoon?

Then another thought came.

Aur agar meri wajah se usse uncomfortable feel hua toh?

That was the thing i was most afraid of.

I don't want her to feel like she had to change herself, her routine, or her life because of me.

I don't want my presence to become a burden for her.

I don't want her to think that because we will live in the same building, i had some right to be a part of her everyday life.

I wanted to be close...

But only if she wanted me close.

I sighed and rubbed my face.

"Bas... normal rehna hai."

I almost laughed at myself.

As if that was easy.Because the moment it came to Akanksha...

Nothing had ever been easy.

My eyes drifted toward the apartment above mine.

The lights were still off.

Tomorrow, that apartment wouldn't be empty anymore.

Tomorrow, she would be there.

Just one floor away.

I stared at it for a few seconds.

Then, very quietly, i smiled.

"Welcome home, Akanksha..."

A tiny smile remained on my face.

"Bas... iss baar main tumhari life mein problem nahi banna chahta."

"Agar tum mujhe sirf ek dost ki tarah apne paas rakhna chahti ho... toh main wahi rahunga."

A beat.

"Chahe mere liye kitna bhi mushkil kyun na ho."

And with that thought, i stayed there in the quiet balcony...

Waiting for tomorrow.

For the day when the distance between us would become just one floor.

Authors pov...

Yogesh was still standing in the balcony, his eyes fixed somewhere in the distance.

His mind was crowded with thoughts.

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow, Akanksha would be moving into this building.

He didn't know why that thought made him feel both relieved and restless at the same time.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice someone approaching behind him.

"Tu kab aayi?" he asked, turning around.

Subhangi was standing there, leaning against the balcony door.

"Abhi," she replied casually. "Jab tu kisi ke khayalon mein khoya hua tha."

Yogesh immediately looked away.

"Aisa nahi hai."

"Toh phir kaisa hai?"

"Bas... nahi, it's just..."

"Kya, Yogesh?"

He stayed quiet for a moment before finally admitting,

"Bas kal ke baare mein soch raha tha."

Subhangi understood immediately.

"Kaun? Akanksha?"

Yogesh gave a small nod.

"Hmm."

"Wo kal shift ho rahi hai na?" Subhangi asked.

"Haan."

"Toh achhi baat hai na. Tujhe toh khush hona chahiye."

Yogesh smiled faintly, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Haan... shayad."

"Shayad?" Subhangi frowned. "What's bothering you?"

Yogesh took a slow breath.

"Pata nahi... bas ek chinta hai."

"Kaisi chinta?"

He looked down at his hands for a moment.

"Main nahi chahta ki wo meri wajah se aur kuch jhele.i know me abhi bhi thik nahi hu..me jitna bhi dikhane ki koshish karu..."

Subhangi's expression softened.

"Usne pehle hi meri wajah se bahut kuch khoya hai, aur wo hurt bhi bahot hui heeri wajah se.." Yogesh continued quietly. "Aur main nahi chahta ki ab bhi usse meri wajah se koi sacrifice karna pade."

"Yogesh..."

"Agar wo sirf meri health ki wajah se, meri situation dekh ke, ya mere liye concerned hoke is building mein shift ho rahi hai..." He paused. "Toh main nahi chahta."

Subhangi stayed silent, letting him speak.

"Because I don't want her to feel like she has to take care of me not after what I had done with her in past

..i don't deserve her care.."

His voice became softer.

"Uski life mein jo bhi decision ho... wo uska apna hona chahiye. Meri wajah se nahi."

He looked toward the city again.

"Main nahi chahta ki meri condition dekh ke uske decisions change ho. Ya usse lage ki agar wo mere paas nahi rahegi toh main theek nahi rahunga."

A small pause.

"Usne already mere liye bohot kuch kiya hai, Subhangi."

He swallowed.

"Ab agar wo mere saath rehna chahti hai... mere paas rehna chahti hai... toh wo isliye ho kyunki wo khud chahti hai. Not because she feels responsible for me."

Subhangi looked at him for a few seconds.

"Tu usse rokna nahi chahta," she said slowly. "Tu bas ye ensure karna chahta hai ki wo apni marzi se aaye."

Yogesh nodded.

"Exactly."

His eyes became slightly moist, but his voice remained steady.

"Main usse kabhi ye feel nahi karwana chahta ki meri care karna uski responsibility hai."

He looked toward the balcony door.

"Uski life uski hai, Subhangi..."

A faint smile appeared on his face.

"Bas... main chahta hoon ki wo khud choose kare apne dil se...."

Subhangi quietly smiled.

"Tu jaanta hai na... kabhi-kabhi kisi ke liye kuch karna sacrifice nahi hota."

Yogesh looked at her.

"Jab wo dil se kiya ho," she added.

He didn't reply.

He simply looked back at the city, carrying the same fear he'd been carrying all evening-

He wanted Akanksha close.

But more than that...

he wanted her to be free.

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